Librarian: [makes meowing sounds because there's a cat in the story]

Five-Year-Old: You know, that's not half bad!

[Entire group of five-year-olds proceeds to attempt to imitate Librarian's meowing]

=-=-=-=-=

Eight-Year-Old: You know, this story's really good, actually.

=-=-=-=-=

Librarian: [reading from 'Beatrice Doesn’t Want To' by Laura Joffe Numeroff] Beatrice didn’t like books. She didn’t like to read. She didn’t even like going to the library.

Five-year-old A: [shocked/horrified gasp]

Five-year-old B: [disapprovingly] This is NOT a good book.

=-=-=-=-=

[While reading 'Stuck' by Oliver Jeffers]

Kid 1: Oh my God, NO. Don’t throw the cat!

[...]

Kid 2: Where did he even GET an orangutan?!

[...]

Kid 3: How’s he even lifting that house?!

Kid 4: He obviously has superpowers like Superman if he can do THAT.

Kid 3: Yeah. Superpowers. Definitely.

[...]

Librarian: I wonder how they’re gonna get everything down if even the firemen got stuck.

Kid 5: Call the police. They wouldn’t get stuck ‘cause they’re smart.

=-=-=-=-=

Librarian: Does a kangaroo have a mother too?

Three-Year-Old: No!

=-=-=-=-=

Librarian: [while reading aloud a book involving the beach] I like going to the beach.

Five-year-old: Me too! I've been to the Bahamas!

Librarian: Oh, I want to go to the Bahamas!

Five-year-old: Then go! It's only two plane rides, six hours.

=-=-=-=-=

[While reading a lift-the-flap book, when a turtle is revealed to be under a rug]

Three-Year-Old: [GASP] Is a tuttle!

=-=-=-=-=

Librarian: Would you share a $500 dollar gift card with your siblings like Kyle did in the story?

Kid 1: Yes, because I have the best siblings in the world.

Kid 2: No! I hate my brothers, I wish they’d stay in the basement all year long.

=-=-=-=-=

Librarian: And the Big Bad Shark said “Little fish! Little fish! Let me in!”

Five-year-old: Nuh uh!

 

 

By Alice Flecha (Volunteer Blogger)